Saturday, October 19, 2013

Texas Is Purple

I'm taking this opportunity to tell you that Texas is purple -- that is, neither overwhelmingly Republican nor overwhelmingly Democratic -- because I've heard so many Democrats, most of whom, I just betcha, haven't ever been in Texas, saying things like "Texas is just hopeless" and "Texans are all morons" and "Can Texas secede now? Please?" and so forth.

I have no problem with people saying that W and Tom DeLay and Rick Perry and Ted Cruz are all morons. They are. And unfortunately they're also the Texas politicians who have garnered the most nationwide attention since Ann Richards died. The thing is, though, neither Perry nor Cruz gained his current office by a landslide, and there are signs of buyer's remorse from some of the good folks who did vote for them, and furthermore, 12 out of Texas' 36 US Representatives are Democrats. That's exactly 1/3 of Texas' US House delegation, and 1/3 is more than Alabama, Alaska, Arkansas, Idaho, Indiana, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, Nebraska, North Carolina, North Dakota, Ohio, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, South Carolina, South Dakota, Tennessee, Utah, Virginia and Wyoming.

Purple.

And those 12 are mostly very liberal Democrats, too. And liberal Democrats aren't just a recent phenomenon in Texas. Take Henry B Gonzalez, who represented Texas's 20th congressional district from 1961 to by-God 1999. According to Wikipedia,

González became known for his liberal views. In 1963, Republican congressman Ed Foreman called González a "communist" and a "pinko" and González confronted him. González was referred to as a "communist" in 1986 by a man at Earl Abel's restaurant, a popular San Antonio eatery. The 70-year-old representative responded by punching him in the face. González was acquitted of assault for this incident.

Yessir, that's a Texas Democrat for you: liberal and mean, and well-loved by his fellow Texans for both. Can you say Lyndon B Johnson? I know that you can. Yes, currently the most well-known Texas politicians outside of Texas are some Republican yahoos, but it might not be long before the most prominent politician from Texas in the US is someone like 39-year-old Joaquin Castro, who is now the Congressman from the 20th district, the same 20th district earlier represented by the 70-year-old who punched a yahoo in the face for callin' him a Commie and was aquitted of charges for it, or maybe Joaquin's twin brother Julián, currently the mayor of San Antonio, a little over half of which is in the 20th district. Whether they go nationwide or not, I'd say it probably couldn't hurt to be on good terms with the Castro family if you want to be a big shot in San Antonio. I'm just guessing. I'm also guessing that Texas will get a lot more blue in the next few years, but that's not just me, that's also most folks who know something about Texas politics and aren't so unbelievably stupid that they consider Ted Cruz to be a hero. People who can count past 10 without takin' off their socks. So brace yrselves, America! This'll be good!

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